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MY INTERNET FEED HAS FROZEN.
20 min: Ah right, the feed's back. I just needed to press refresh, rather than sitting around waiting for something to happen. You've missed nothing (I assume). "This may well be an error," begins Jimmy McCrae, "but my knowledge of Polish and the frequent borrowings of the Slavonic languages suggests to me that to say 'the' Ukraine is not all too egregious. 'U' in Polish means 'around', 'by' or 'at', among other things. 'Kraj' connotes 'country'. Considering the historical and geographical proximity of the two states, not to mention Ukraine's unfortunate status as a frequent whipping-boy throughout history, that it literally might be called the 'around-country' or 'border', and thus might demand a definite article, is a possibility not to be discounted." Sounds reasonable to me. Which almost certainly means a professor is going to email in about 15 minutes to argue the exact opposite.
24 min: Ukraine / The Ukraine are pushing forward a lot, but England are well organised at the back. Nothing much is going on as the visitors batten down the hatches and try to clear their heads after Green's sending off. "Isn't the telly and the web-connected computer pretty much the same thing these days?" asks Gary Naylor. "But we're always going to have two (at least) boxes with screens in most homes, because computers and tellies just feel different don't they? Combining an alarm clock and a coffee-machine seemed a good idea, but how many people use teasmades? Aside from the camera / phone combo, few hybrid machines succeed." Talk of Teasmades on a Saturday night... it's like Brucie's Generation Game never went away.
28 min: This is a lot of end-to-end long-ball rubbish, catching practice for Pyatov and James.
29 min: GOAL!!! Ukraine 1-0 England. Cole, Terry and Ferdinand all stand around like pieces of bedroom furniture as Milevskiy skitters across the face of the England area from right to left. Only the much-maligned Johnson responds, with a decent tackle, but is unlucky to see the ball break to Nazarenko, whose goalward shot is deflected by Cole's desperate header and into the left-hand side of the net. How is the usual fall guy Johnson going to be blamed for this one, then?